A Dog’s Life 
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Satirical Commentary By Nicole Hanratty
 
 
Dog is such a complicated word. There are multiple expressions that utilize it with a variety of meanings. For example: being “a dog’s age” makes you ancient; “dogging it” is a cop out; “a dog’s life” is not an enviable one; “every dog has his day” gives us all hope that we may one day win the lottery; “letting sleeping dogs lie” is usually a wise decision; “going to the dogs” is a degenerative existence; “putting on the dog” shows off your wealth; while “teaching an old dog new tricks” forces us to break our old bad habits. The one idiom I take exception to is “a dog’s life.” Contrary to the popular interpretation, I think of a dog’s life as a reference to something enviable, fabulous, pampered, sheltered, well provided for and carefree! On a scale of one to ten, my dog’s life gets ten stars... On a daily basis, my little princess gets fed three meals a day. In the morning, she gets fresh cut up fruit on top of her little scoop of allergy friendly dry dog food. She waits by her bowl as soon as I begin to start cutting up the fruit and lets me know she won’t be left out of the party. Mid morning, she demands her special canned food and in the late afternoon there is yet a third feeding of more dry food or possibly some other gourmet home made selection. In between, she gets a variety of treats that all work for her allergic, sensitive little tummy that I have scoured the universe to find. Personal Chef (check) By appointment, my little hound gets walked daily. She gets the appropriate amount of socializing out on her excursions with other four legged creatures and gets to take care of all her business without delay. She even has someone to clean up after her. Playdates (check) Personal Attendant (check) As if her life wasn’t cushy enough with the multiple beds that have been purchased for her from Maxwell Dog, (which are moved around hourly as the sun moves about the house throughout the afternoon), my little angel also gets Lap Time. Not a day passes without her getting to snuggle up on a warm lap to get her little head scratched. As soon as she sees her opportunity she runs for her favorite new Bully Stick, (my dog doesn’t know what it is like to have an old bone), and jumps right into position. Sun Bathing (check) Snuggle Time (check) Then there are the spa treatments. Every week she gets shampooed in a warm shower with an integrated massage, towel-dried and sprayed with her own Juicy Crittoure (Juicy Couture Doggy) Soft Spot Coat Conditioning Mist. Why wouldn’t she? Hair Stylist (check)  Doggie Styles keeps her outfitted with a collar for every occasion and provides her with all of her highly fashionable clothing. Couture (check) Personal Shopper (check) She gets driven to all of her favorite hangout spots while properly seat-belted in her plush puppy booster seat. Chauffer (check) She’s not expected to learn anything on her own and is a true Dream Dog. (Thank you, Connie!) Personal Trainer (check) Of course, I realize her posh life doesn’t come without a ton of responsibilities. She is required to be on guard 24/7, show off her tricks on demand, and be a constant loyal companion. But really, as a wife, so am I. She just gets more perks than me. Lucky dog... Au revoir for now...n 2008 Copyright Nicole Hanratty http://www.naturalbalanceinc.com/allergy/home.htmlhttp://www.naturalbalanceinc.com/allergy/PandDtreats.htmlhttp://www.petco.com/Content/SiteMapProductList.aspx?N=22+127&rpp=100http://www.maxwelldog.com/http://www.bullysticksonline.com/servlet/the-Free-Range-ODOR-dsh-FREE-Bully-Sticks/Categorieshttp://www.styledash.com/2007/10/24/juicy-crittoure-for-your-posh-pup/http://www.juicycouture.com/store/catalog/catalogPage.jhtml?tid=P9&itemId=cat134&parentId=cat000000&masterId=&cmCat=cat000000cat134http://www.doggiestylesonline.com/http://www.dreamdogsla.net/http://www.dreamdogsla.net/dream-dogs-dog-training.htmlshapeimage_7_link_0shapeimage_7_link_1shapeimage_7_link_2shapeimage_7_link_3shapeimage_7_link_4shapeimage_7_link_5shapeimage_7_link_6shapeimage_7_link_7shapeimage_7_link_8shapeimage_7_link_9
A Dog’s Life Isn’t So Bad by Nicole Hanratty
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
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